An Excerpt From "Journey With Jeff"

This excerpt is called, "Sitting On My Hands?" and the quote is from Anonymous: "Real Friends are those who, when you feel you've made a fool of yourself, don't feel you've done a permanent job." ~~~ My friend Carol's personality was the opposite of mine, even though we were both teachers and we both had babies with special needs. Unhampered by any worry of what people might think of her, she asked all the questions needed to discover what she wanted to know and said exactly what she believed ought to be said. Other people might have been afraid to offend, but she felt free to speak out. I found her advice to be sound - even though I might not like it - such as the time when Jeff was 20 months old and having trouble coordinating his spoon with his mouth. Since his growth had been so slow, I was feeding him to ensure all the food necessary for that growth went inside him rather than down the front of his bib. When Carol discovered I wasn't letting Jeff work at feeding himself, she planted her hands on her hips, tucked in her chin, and said in her best classroom voice, "Now just a minute, Mama! Aren't you actually defeating your purpose with this child? You want him to grow and do things for himself, yet you're feeding him as if he were still an infant. For heaven's sake, he'll be two years old this spring!" I opened my mouth in protest, but she quickly added, "You're so finicky! Give Jeff a spoon of his own while you continue to make sure he gets most of it inside, but let Jeff keep trying to feed himself!" I had to admit I hated cleaning up the mess that covered the table, high chair, and floor whenever Jeff insisted upon wielding his own spoon. However, I began sitting on my hands and letting him do it. It took day-to-day sitting, but by the following April, I could write in his Progress Report, "There was much more mess last spring when Jeff ate his meals!" And my prayer, Mother God, You understand! Yet, You encourage us to grow. Thank You for sending friends to help in that process! Amen.