Friday, September 26, 2008

How do you read "Journey With Jeff"?

Hello again! My schedule was much too full a couple of weeks ago, and consequently my back stressed into spasms which lasted longer than usual. My doctor found that my asthma was aggravating things, slowing the healing down. I knew my doctor had picked up "Journey With Jeff" when a friend from church took it to a doctor's meeting and he proclaimed that he should have it first because he knew the author best! I asked if he had finished reading it, and he explained he's reading it a little at a time. My pastor is using the book as a devotional, reading it a day at a time. A couple of friends have said they read it through in one day, not wanting to put it down. How are you reading "Journey"? Have you written a review on Amazon.com yet to recommend that others read Jeff's story?~~~ This excerpt follows the previous blog's excerpt. It is titled, "Struck Numb." ~ "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from helping me, from the words of my groaning?" Psalm 22:1 ~ Eighteen-month-old Jeff was happy anywhere he went. He loved to smile at people and to give them hugs. I knew he wouldn't mind seeing another doctor, but I was on edge outside the unfamiliar office and impatient to know what this doctor would tell us about the persistently noisy breathing. ~ The nurse opened the door and called our name. Jeff grabbed my fingers and two of Bob's, lifted himself up, and led the way into the office. The nurse smiled, and I returned her smile, hoping it foretold good news. ~ Healthy ivy and spider plants hung from the windows and there was a palm tree in the corner of the room. I wondered, Did I water mine at home? The faint smell of rubbing alcohol, the tall cabinet of instruments, and the examining table in the middle of the room rudely reminded me of where we were. But I liked the Mozart that was playing, glad it wasn't popular or show tunes because when I had something important to do, classical music always helped me concentrate. ~ The tall, slim, forty-ish looking specialist appeared and spoke to Jeff and to us. He was quiet and friendly, and took his time checking Jeff's history, watching him pull himself around the office mostly in a sitting position. "Okay, Cowboy!" he finally said, "Are you ready to get up here and let me check you out?" ~ With a big smile, Jeff allowed himself to be lifted up onto the examination table. While he checked Jeff's active body and I held my breath, the specialist asked unhurried, studied questions about that noisy breathing. I began to relax and to feel optimistic. ~ Then he asked about the age at which Jeff had raised his head, sat up, stood up, and started walking. "Jeff took his first steps along about four weeks ago," I told the doctor with a proud grin. "He loves walking around our house, pulling us by our fingers, trying to race with our bouncing dog." ~ "Seventeen months old when he started to walk..." said the doctor slowly. "Did you ever think, Mr. and Mrs. Reisch...did you ever think that Jeff might be retarded?" ~ Suddenly I couldn't breathe. The room seemed very hot. Retarded? Our baby? Impossible! Slow maybe, but nothing to be worried about. The doctor's voice, describing various signs of retardation, darted in and out of my thoughts, shooting down bright hopes and dreams for Jeff one by one, exploding them out of existance. ~ I wanted to scream at the doctor, "No! You are wrong!" Instead, I gathered our papers and our coats mechanically, cold shivers running down my back. I needed desperately to get away from that office. Bob's arm steered us steadily to the car. Holding Jeff close in my arms all the way home, I rocked him and crooned insensibly, "Bye baby bunting, Daddy's gone a-hunting." ~ My voice cracked, but I kept on crooning. Numbly, staring into space, with tears running down my face, I repeatedly told myself, "When Jeff wakes up he will be our normal child again. Please, God." How do I pray, Lord? How do I pray? (Photo is Jeff at 2 years.)
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