A Different Point of View

My friend, Bobbie, surprised me by saying "Journey With Jeff"had changed her life! She and I belonged to a Writer's Group where I read an excerpt from this book for them to critique a while ago. Bobbie said, "You made me see a different point of view. Usually I avoid people with special needs so I don't look as if I am pitying them." She continued, "Driving through town recently, I saw a person leaning on arm crutches crossing the street -- very, very slowly. It made me wonder what it must be like when crossing a street requires every bit of one's energy." Was Bobbie putting herself in that person's shoes, and sensing her determination, courage, and perseverance, rather than looking the other way?!? It makes me very happy to make a difference in someone's life!

Conversations With Kim - My Cheerleader!

Kim works with adults with special needs at a Rochester agency. I met her at our Lutheran Women's convention in October where she bought a copy of "Journey With Jeff." She has a special place in her heart for people who live with Down syndrome. We had lots to share, and she calls me her "mentor," enthusiastically talking about the book to everyone she can. Howie works at the agency, too, and related how he met Jeff and me at Camp Joy. This photo of Jeff and Howie at Camp Joy made her smile, and comment that "when people with Downs smile, it lights up the whole room!"~~~Kim's thoughts mean even more when she tells me she's a twin, born blind, and with no muscle tone. Her mother worked unbelievably hard and long on her legs, even when the doctors said it was hopeless. The three optical operations she had, and the persistent sessions with her legs resulted in being able to see, and then, for 29 years to hold the job she has now!! Kim is one of my best cheerleaders! She has asked me to send her a dozen copies of the book, and 1/2 dozen CDs of "Journey With Jeff," imagining every person she can possibly tell about the difference Jeff made in God's world! You go, girl!!

A Walk In My Shoes by C. Waeltermann

Twas the Night Before Christmas ~~ Autism Style
And all through the house the creatures were stirring, yes even the mouse.
We tried melatonin and gave a hot bath but the holiday jitters they always distract.
The children were finally all nestled in bed
when nightmares of terror ran through my own head.
Did I get the right gift, the right color and style,
Would there be a tantrum or even, maybe, a smile?
Our relatives come but they don't understand
the pleasure he gets from just flapping his hands.
"He needs discipline," they say, "Just a well-needed smack,
You must learn to parent.." and on goes the attack.
We smile and nod because we know deep inside
The argument is moot..let them all take a side.
We know what it's like to live with the spectrum
The struggles and triumphs, achievements, regressions....
But what they don't know and what they don't see
Is the joy that we feel over simplicity.
He said, "Hello." He ate something green! He told his first lie! He did not cause a scene!
He peed on the potty, who cares if he's ten, He stopped saying the same thing again and again!
Others don't realize just how we can cope, how we bravely hang on at the end of our rope.
But what they don't see is the joy we can't hide
when our children with autism make the tiniest stride.
We may look at others without the problems we face with jealousy, hatred or even distaste.
But what they don't know, nor sometimes do we is that children with autism bring simplicity.
We don't get excited over expensive things. We jump for joy with the progress work brings.
Children with autism try hard every day - that they make us proud more than words can say.
They work even harder than you or I to achieve something small, to reach a star in the sky.
So to those who don't get it or can't get a clue take a walk in my shoes and I'll assure you...
That even 10 minutes into the walk you'll look at me with respect, even shock.
You will realize what it is I go through and the next time you judge I can assure you
That you won't say a thing, you'll be quiet and learn,
like the years that I did when the tables were turned. (www.autisticliving.com~~Photo-Jeff's sister's Christmas gift for him.)

Hello From the Past!

Thirty-plus years ago a teenage gal in Dunkirk named Diane babysat with Jeff for us. Today she wrote an e-mail introducing herself again. She said: "I have a funny story I remember about Jeff -- I was babysitting one time and he proceeded to move some of his bedroom furniture out to the front yard -- do you remember that? I didn't know what to do about it, but let him carry on because it made him happy!" No, I did not remember that! Wish I knew what he was thinking as he wrestled it down the stairway!! ~~~Diane had received a Christmas card from Bishop Marie and Pastor Jim Jerge (who had married her and her husband) so she decided to explore the Upstate NY ELCA Synod website. She came across Marie's review of "Journey With Jeff," and said I still had that warm, kind face she remembered as a little girl, then asked to purchase a copy of "Journey." We wrote back and forth for an hour and a half -- What a bonus!! (Photo is of Jeff at 14, when we still lived in Dunkirk.)

Life at Jeff's Fullest Potential

Brenda is one of the Lifetime Assistance Inc. workers at Main Street, Brockport who bought a copy of "Journey With Jeff" earlier this year. Brenda recommends: "Journey With Jeff deserves a 5 Star Rating. This book has a message for all. Sybil's story about Jeff showed me his life, through her 'eyes and heart.' I saw and felt her challenges and pain. I wondered how she found the courage to keep going. Her determination to keep going even at times when she questioned the 'why of it all' is inspiring. She could have adopted that 'pity me attitude.' She did not. She took each day and found the true meaning of the little things that make up the life of a child. In Jeff's story, there is a message for all. The message is of Jeff's determination to live his life to his fullest potential and his Mother's courage to make sure that was possible. Sybil is an inspiration."~~~Thank you, Brenda!!

The Intensity of Raising Jeff and Jennifer

 
I remember reading a book by Annie Dillard about living a life so deeply consecrated that it would be like a moth attracted to a candle. The moth would be so intense about the flame that he would actually fly into it and be consumed. ~~~ As I remember, Annie Dillard wrote that we needed to be so intense about our mission in life that we could be consumed with it. At that point in my life, I was bringing up a son with Down Syndrome and a daughter with high grades in school. Life was intense!! I was trying to learn all I could to help my son develop and become all God had made him to be, as well as our daughter. I saw myself consumed with this challenge!!! And, it felt good to have such a purpose!!~~~ I was also trying to gather all the notes I had written since Jeff was six years old (1967) when I began listing all the things this child COULD do. 30 - no, 40 years later "Journey With Jeff" was ready for the world! Publishers said, "This is lovely, but we can't use it," so I read the 155 stories onto 5 CDs. These also are available, for enjoyment as you drive. Send an e-mail to rsreisch@frontiernet.net. (Photo is Jeff helping his Jennifer learn to walk.)

Don't Quit, Keep Playing

"This is a story about Ignace Paderewski, Poland's famous concert pianist. A mother who had ambitions for her own young son's piano playing bought tickets for a Paderewski concert. When the night of the concert arrived, the mother and her son found their seats near the front of the auditorium and kept their eye on the great, majestic Steinway on the stage. Soon the mother was talking to a friend in the seat next to hers and her son slipped away unnoticed.~~~When eight o'clock arrived the spotlights dimmed. The audience became very quiet and only then did they notice the young boy up on the piano bench, innocently fingering "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star."~~~Needless to say, his mother gasped, but before she could jump from her seat to retrieve her son, the master pianist himself appeared on stage and quickly moved to the keyboard. "Don't quit, keep playing," he whispered to the boy.~~~Leaning over, Paderewski reached down with his left hand and began filling in the base part. Then his right arm reached around the other side, encircling the child, to add a running treble part. Together, the old master and the little boy held the crowd spellbound.~~~In the same way we know the master surrounds our lives and whispers in our ear, time and again, "Don't quit, Keep playing." (Excerpt from "Journey With Jeff." Photo ~ Jeff at four years old, entertaining a friend.)